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Friday, September 30, 2005

"I'm not going to smile today, I'm not going to laugh..."
-Cake


haven't been here in a while. had fires, hurricanes, floods, exploding busloads of senior citizens. sounds downright biblical, don't it? i was thinking, you know those rappers and athletes who are thanking god every time someone puts a microphone in their face? i was thinking that you couldn't possible have someone call these hurricanes God's Will this time, right? i mean there's no plus side to any of this that could be mistaken for devine intervention, right? right?! wrong! whenever a zealot is left hanging like that, they'll fill in the blanks with their own righteous cause. this is why we're hearing hateful shit like the refugees deserved what they got, that the newly homeless down there are doing better on a football field than living in a shack, that THEY should have left town so it's their fault they got killed, that they're spending their government-issued two thousand dollar credit cards on booze and drugs. see, this is the problem, every time there's a natural disaster it wipes out a bunch of non-whites and that makes it easy for the white people to say hey! there must be a good reason! god wouldn't kill any innocent people, right? the simple fact is you're less likely to be broke and a victim of the weather if you're white. so when there's a mudslide or something, the broke brown people in the world get killed real quick. even though this is Logic 101 you still get racist fucks like the former first lady hinting that the victims are exaggerating their plight. that the the hurricane is "working out well for them." then she says her comments were midunderstood. people like her, they disquise their racism in these little snickers and codewords. see, i'm a hateful fuck but i won't hide anything at all. i'll drop my dick right in her fucking bowl of cereal. here is exactly what i'm thinking right now, this will leave little room for misinterpretation, confusion or taking it out of context:

i would like to grab Barbara Bush by the face with a kind of "fish hook" wrestling move. i will hook her mouth and maybe a nostril and i will drag her to the nearest homeless person. on the way there she will probably let out a hideous bird-like squawk and her pearls will be flying everywhere and one of her pointy shoes will fall off as she claws at the air to keep her balance. she has probably never been touched in twenty-some years so having her face man-handled like a fucking bowling ball will be very traumatic for her. in her panic, she'll make strange animal-like noises and maybe piss herself. when i finally find a homeless person, i will politely ask them to point me to the last place they shat and i will rub that miserable dried-up cunt's face in homeless shit until she's forced to swallow some in order to breathe. then i will run away because everything is funnier when you run away after you do it.

on the lighter side of things, i think that show on Spike TV where they dub voices over that crazy Japanese game show is hysterical. or is it Chinese? see, i'm a racist too i guess.

::: david - 1:52 PM [+] :::
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