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Monday, March 13, 2006

"One plays with books, the other plays with guns..."
- Highwayman 2


a warm night. got my windows open, bare feet on the window sill, listening to music. it's a good night. but you know what? i thought the first Highwayman album had nutty lyrics. that's nothing compared to the second one. check out that song up there. how does someone "play" with books? i understand that the kid playing with guns is supposed to be the crazy one but any kid that plays with his books instead of reading them is clealy insane. i'd rather my kid played with guns instead of trying to wear a book like a hat or pretending the book was a car. you might be wondering why i bought Highwayman II if i was making fun of Highwayman I. because i'm fucking stupid, that's why. and i've run out of Johnny Cash so i have to check out his side projects. even side projects that aren't really side projects. like the bizzare neo-Johnny Cash cameo in the movie The Punisher. what kind of happy horseshit was that??? but yeah, i had a good weekend. getting used to these weekends off. sunday good, saturday good. friday good but i got three words for you: wish i knew her in Boston. that's all i'll say about that. makes sense to me anyway.

hey, just remembered a little morality tale from earlier today:

first, i watch this girl ringing up my sandwich steal the money instead of put it in the drawer, then i sit in my car eating the sub and dwelling on it long after i've digested. why do i care?

here's how she did it. she looks around then hits no sale on the register, then drops my money in, but no receipt pops out. she hands me the bag and slams the drawer and smiles "thank you, sir" and i stood there for an extra second and then walked out. i felt weird, like she stole from me, but there i am walking away with the sandwich i paid for so that's not really accurate. and i don't think i'm capable of ratting anyone out, so it's not like i have the urge to tell her boss. hell, maybe her boss is a real cocksucker that deserves worse that shady employees. see, that bothered me the most, the fact that i thought i might be angry because i wanted to get her fired. i was reminded of this one girl who told me how she got the pizza dude fired because she saw him pissing behind the dumpster after he delivered her pizza. she called and told his boss what she saw and the guy said he was going to fire him for it. she told me this story all proud and i said to her, "you dumb bitch, why the fuck do you care if he pisses behind a dumpster?" and she was furious at me for not seeing what a good deed she thought she'd done. i told her that if i was that pizza dude, i would have waited a year, got another pizza job in the area, then calmly waited for her to order food again so i could sprinkle her pizza with firm, cajun-seasoned shit. then, after she ate it, she'd find a sealed envelope under the crust with a list of ingredients so she knew exactly what she ate and why. then i'd piss on her dumpter. then i'd run. 'cause i hate people like that. people who get pleasure in tattling on others. i've just always hated people who find joy in that kind of thing. so, if you're reading this right now, and you wish that you could get this girl in trouble, you might be one of those people. and i might hate you. but the fact that i was all frowning when i ate my sandwich made me want to analyze my feelings further, to make sure i didn't want to tell on her. and then, on the drive home, POW! it hit me. i figured it out:

i was disturbed because the girl who pocketed the money thought she was fooling ME. that's all there is too it. i don't give a fuck if she broke any rule or law or ripped off her boss, i wouldn't care if she was a maniac making the sandwiches with humans, i was simply angry that she thought I was tricked. i should have asked for a receipt just so she knew i knew. that's what i should have done, but i didn't. anyway. i'll see if she does it again tommmorrow. i'm guessing she did it because i got some cookies with my sandwich and it made for a nice round number with no change. i'll try it again with the cookies, just for fun.

so my new job gave me a pair of hockey tickets? this secretary came over to my desk and smiles and hands me this envelope with my name on it. inside, two $50 tickets to the Penguins vs. Devils game. i asked my boss why and he said they do that sometimes just to be nice. they just pick a name randomly, i guess. how 'bout that shit? what's next? i get up some morning and my boss is making me scrambled eggs?

me- "how the hell did you get in here???"
boss- "you won the raffle!"
me- "where's your pants?!?"
boss- "don't scream..."

could happen.

p.s. a brief note about my jealousy of musicians. i've always said that if i could have any skills, i'd change nothing about myself, and i'd wish for the same skills that i already have. except for one thing. i wouldn't mind playing music. this probably stems from my Jr. High friends kicking me out of their band at least twice. and you go to the bars and you see guys in a band and they get to be king for a day up there and i think, that's be sweet. buy you know what? i don't really want to switch places or switch skills with them. you know why?

because when they get done playing and the dude's standing there like everyone else without a guitar in his hand...he's just some asshole.

::: david - 12:14 AM [+] :::
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