..:S...P...I...D...E...R...B...I...T...E...S:..

Wednesday, July 30, 2003

"That's the way that it goes, when you're down here with the rest of us..."
-Social Distortion


or, as the dumb shit who labeled the MP3, "Socal" Distortion. apparently, this is a very popular Southern California cover band that's sounds EXACTLY like the real thing! who'd have guessed? i'm mean, at first i just figured they were fucking up the spelling, but after my fifth "Socal" Distortion song from five different sources, i realized that "socal" is what the hip kids call that stretch of beach, so it must be on purpose right? wrong. here's the deal, if you're one of the people that doesn't take the time to label your MP3s correctly, you need to NOT put them up on the internet for me to see. okay? i cannot deal with misspellings scrolling through the window of my player and that means i waste my precious time loading them onto my desktop and changing the tags. if you can't be bothered with labeling them correctly, just keep them to yourself, along with your Nick Crave, Bruce Springsteem and Limp Bisquick files. okay, the last one was probably on purpose.

so i sort of fucked up my ankle today. i have this chin-up bar that i attach to doorjams to exercise on, and there really isn't a doorway that's the right size around here so i hit the woods like Tarzan and tried to find a good branch. i seem to remember climbing trees all through childhood but it took a half hour to find one with a branch low enough that i could reach. now, on the chin-up bar contraption, i can do every exercise i want. regular chin-ups to hit the biceps, turn my hands like i'm hanging from a steering wheel to hit the triceps. and if you imagine yourself hanging from a steering wheel out a wreck off the edge of a cliff, like i do, you can keep going way past exhaustion. dude. if i ever was in that situation, any by-standers would be amazed at my stamina. they'd be all like "holy shit. i thought he was pulling himself up but look...he's exercising!" anyway, turn my hands again, like you're gripping handlebars, and i hit the forearms. then there's the behind the head for my back, leg raises for my stomache etc. i've gotten in better shape on this than i ever did with free weights so i HAD to find the right branch. after i'm tired of crashing around the woods, i settle for one i think will work and it's on an angle and i'm trying to use it anyway and i realize that, because of the strange slant i'm hanging at, i'm working a new muscle between my bicep and forearm. only it's just on my right arm. i think what the hell, and keep doing it, watching as the tendons and blood in my joint bulge in a way i've never seen before. so while i'm doing this i start thinking that, when dude's work out, it's just to impress females, so wouldn't someone be equally impressed if they discovered a new muscle? i mean, what if you could take a tiny barbell and give yourself one giant finger. shouldn't that make the ladies fuckin' swoon? hell, anyone can get the traditional muscles in shape, it takes a special kind of endurance to work on something new, especially if it serves no purpose except to inflate a body part with blood, much like a lizard will inflate the red pouch under it's head and-CRACK! branch snapped and i hit the ground. it was only about 3 feet down but my legs were crossed behind me so i could get lower with the chin-ups and i couldn't unfold them in time to land on my feet square. it was like that gasp at the Olympics when some 12-year old does a faceplant off the parallel bars.
foot's not that bad though. just hurts. the story is more interesting than the injury. it's usually the other way around.

godDAMN did anyone catch the trailer for "Once Upon A Time in Mexico?" that movie looks like the fuckin SHIT. i'm a huge fan of El Mariachi and Desperado and was a proud owner of Ramirez independent filmmaking guide (until i gave it to my sister's boyfriend and then they broke up) so it's great to see him off that Spy Kids nonsense and back to the kind of bloodbath he does so well. course Spy Kids probably paid for this movie so i shouldn't complain. that preview looks sweeeeeet! be nice to actually want to see something again. last good movie was 28 Days Later and now they're talking about how it's got a new ending on it? what up with that shit? i had to drive an hour from Toledo to Ann Arbor to see that bitch and i have no idea where movies are playing around here so i guess i'll have to wait for dvd. it took way to long to finally find some mom and pop video store just to rent something tonight. luckily i made it out of there WITHOUT A JOB (i'm a sucker for wanting to work in videostores, i love to see what crap people rent) but i did come home with Daredevil. i guess that's what i was looking for. i know it's going to suck real hard, aspecially with Asslick as the lead, but me and my friends used to read those comics back in the little league days so i'm curious enough to take the bullet.

in other news: got a bite on my screenplay. i got an answer to one of my letters and they requested the entire manuscript so we'll see. i've been through this once before so this means i'm walking around cocky and invincible for a couple weeks, then doubts starts to creep in, then the letter with the "however..." i'm thinking that these people would hesitate to fire off these rejection notices if they knew i taped them to the wall to piss on while i did chin-ups. okay, that was an exaggeration, but i remember the names. their lack of vision might cost them their lives if they're ever stuck under something heavy and i'm the only one around. if i come across a burning wreck and hear screams, i'll need to see their license and check my shit-list before the rescue. of course i'd excercise off their steering wheel first.

::: david - 1:24 AM [+] :::
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